your asshole.


What swear word are you?
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You are "Welcome to the Caribbean, love."
You're more than a little world-weary, but also
intelligent and you keep your head when things
get dodgy. You're everybody's favorite
drinking buddy, but your stubbornness does get
in the way sometimes.


Which one of Captain Jack Sparrow's bizarre sayings from Pirates of the Caribbean are you?
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Yeah whatever.
Nothing going on at all. I actually left my house for the first time in 6 days today. Nick took me to USI to get my books and to refill a prescription. I got my 3rd bottle of liquid Lortab. FYI, don't get your tonsils taken out ever. I really think I would go about things differently if I had the chance. Cause this really sucks, possibly worse than having Strep thoat for the rest of my life. I can't eat, sleep, remember things, walk. I'm really getting worried about school starting in a week. I'm gonna be screwed if I don't start healing. So if anybody is bored, come visit me. It seems that my visitors have tapered off a bit. We can color! And eat applesauce! Actually I did eat tomato soup for lunch today, it was bad ass.

Have you guys ever had this problem:Something happening while you are stuck in the house and on drugs and it just so happens to be the only thing that has happened in the last week, so it is the only thing that you have to think about, no matter how hard you try. And you have no way to fix it, or better yet...understand it. And it drives you crazy. And then you start staring at your fingers, cause they look funny when you move them around real fast. No? Yeah, me neither.

I got a text message from Liz, they made it to Cali ok and their apartment is awesome, of course. I sure will miss you guys.

Well I guess I better go before my medicine kicks in, can't really think of anything that needs to be said. Woooooo, I'm getting tingly.

Miss me.

SELL OUT

Favorite internet site? talklikeapirate.com
Blogs: indulgent or informative? Both
Dark or milk chocolate? milk
Fave fruit? tomatoes
Fave restaurant? La Chareada
Fave dessert? anything chocolate
How do you order your steak cooked? pink in the middle, whatever that's called.
Bath or shower? Usually showers.
Have you bathed with anyone? yes
Favorite place on earth? haven't found it yet.
Favorite feature about yourself (physical)? my hands
Favorite feature about yourself (mental)? growing strength
Name anything you haven’t tried that you want to. Move out of the state.
Name something you will never do. sky dive
Favorite name for a girl? Avah, Adah
Favorite name for a boy? Michael, Gabriel, Lucas, Gary (HAHA)
What was the last thing to absolutely amuse the shit out of you? Finding out that my sisiter just got grounded for a month for flipping off the cat.
List 5 uses for ice. 1)reduce swelling 2)make things cold 3)suck on 4) chew on 5) skate on.
Was there a moment in your life when things could’ve gone two completely different ways? What was it? Yes, when I fucked up a whole year of school and was really close to just giving up.
What is one trait you definitely get from your mother? quick temper
What is one trait you definitely get from your father? everything else, eyebrows
Would you rather have more intelligence, looks, or humor? intelligence
If you could give one thing to one person, what would it be? Why? I would give my dad the world for everything he has done for me (well that's more than one thing). I would give myself more Lortab, cause I wanna die.
If you were an animal, what would you be? a fish
Passions: funny or sucking? BOTH
Favorite place to be kissed? Neck. Back.
What is your porn name (first pet + maternal grandma’s maiden name)? Humphrey Thomas
What is your drag queen name (middle name + street you live on)? Elizabeth East Illinois
Trogdor vs. Godzilla : who would win? Trogdor
Meal you most frequently cook when you’re at home alone? salad or turkey sandwich
Favorite ice cream flavor? Ben N Jerry's Fish Food
Ideal date? Octember 35th
If you hadn’t chosen your current major/job, what would’ve been your second choice? Third? Cosmatologist, floral arrangement, outdoor cooking.
How many roommates (not family members) have you had? Who were they? (3) - Ginger, Cheyenne, Jennifer
What would your ideaL vacation be? Going anywhere with an ocean. Not being on my period. No more than 3-4 people.
Where would you most like a gift certificate from? Pier 1 Imports, Bed Bath & Beyond, Target.
Favorite sno cone flavor? strawberry
Favorite carnival food? egg rolls, chocolate covered banana, potato soup in a bread bowl at the Fall Festival
Fave breakfast cereal? cinnamon toast crunch, golden grahams
How do you like your eggs? over medium.
Skim or 2% milk? skim
Pulp or no pulp? pulp
Favorite Dinner? Spaghetti
Macintosh or Windows? Windows
Fave fabric softener? Downy
Fave brand of undies? Victoria's Secret
Fave hair dye brand and name? whatever
Fave shampoo? pantene pro-v
Fave toothpaste? Crest whitening
Do you have a signature scent? prob not
Fave bath and body works scent? strawberries and champagne
Antibacterial soap (yes or no)? YES
Fave article of clothing? my silver jeans (brand, not color) I wear them all the time.
top 5 dvds you own? 1)Blair Thumb (Matt took it back, so I guess I don't own it). 2) Spirited Away 3) 8 mile 4) Karaoke party 5) don't have any more.
top 5 cds you own? 1) Tori Amos - little earthquakes 2) boys for pele 3)under the pink 4) Tool - aemina 5)Incubus - science
what position do you sleep in? on left side, fetus style
how often do you wash your hair? everyday
Fave brand/type of condoms? Trojan spermicidally lubricated
Top 5 people you wish you were closer/still close to? no comment
Worst 5 things about you? I'm insecure,strange,scared, sarcastic, never forget.
Best 5 things about you? I'm motivated, organized, my hair, motherly, always forgive.
Biggest turnoff? bodily noises
Biggest turnon? dark hair, dark eyes, long eyelashes, hilarious
Do you have a list of places where you want to have sex?
top 5 from the sex list? car, park (grass, flowers), beach (water,sand), kitchen table, anywhere while on Lortab.
Books or movies? Movies, probably.
Music or tv to fall asleep? TV
Morning or night person? depends
Perfect # of hours of sleep to function best? 7
What makes you happiest? having time to clean out my drawers and closet and painting my toenails. having someone take care of me when I'm not feeling well.
Fave guilty pleasure? Ludacris, Eminem, (old) No Doubt
Fave fantasy career? Cruiseline Nurse
cat or dog person? both
is the glass half empty or half full? half empty
worst fear? getting old, heights, bridges, leaving my father alone
any near death experiences? probably
any ghost sightings? i think so
are you good with kids? yep
are you good with adults? a lot better than I used to be
beer or wine? wine (soleo or riunite)
is super troopers funny? yes
thread count of your sheets? no clue
do you like ethnic food? some
spicy or mild? spicy
are you a good driver or no? yes
is Gap overpriced? nah
do you get along with your parents? always with my dad. it has taken a lot of work with my mom. As much as I hate to admit it, I think we are just too much alike.
your siblings? yes
what's your worst habit? smoking
summer or winter? neither
mountains or ocean? ocean (never really seen the mountains)
sugar or salt? both
laugh or cry? laugh
do you know any good jokes? MY FAVORITE
Q: Where did the general hide his armies?
A: In his sleevies.
best pickup line? Used on me(didn't work): Nice ass, can I wear it as a hat?
fave nail polish color? the color I'm wearing now on my toes. It looks green from one angle, blue and purple from other angles.
are you gorgeous or just cute? I dunno
what's your purpose in life? Be the first person in my family to go to college and graduate. Be the first female to live past the age of 19 without getting pregnant.
what superhero do you most identify with? Thundar the Barbarian
what's the most attractive part of the opposite sex's body? eyes, ass, neck, hands, arms.
should sex mean something or everything? something
fave book? Precious Moments Bible
fave cartoon character? Meatwad
wheat or white bread? white

Are you a moron in a cage?
No?
MORON ON THE LOOSE!
MORON ON THE LOOSE!

Yeah so once again I get on here thinking that I have a lot to write about, but I can't think of a damn thing to say.

Hung out with Liz, JD, and Mike on Saturday. Went to the Casino. Lost fucking $6. Mother Fuckers!!! Then came back home with everyone to play with my puggies. Oh yeah Dad and Cindy went out of town this past weekend to go to the Brickyard Race thing (yeah I know). And I didn't want to stay home with the boys, so I leave. I thought I had put the fear of God in them by threatening to call my uncle if I found out that they or their minor friends even thought about drinking in my house. Well I come home with everybody after going to the casino to find my house fucking trashed. Beer bottles, beer cans, empty gallons of liquor, wine coolers, cigarette butts and pot seeds. Someone also ate my fucking pizza that I got from Una Tu's. Cindy's daughter was there and made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, left the ingredients on the counter and the jelly covered crust on the dining room table. For some reason that pissed me off more than anything. I mean my grandma made the fucking jelly, it needs to be refrigerated after it's opened. Who are these fucking people? So after Liz, Mike, and JD left, I stayed up until 6 am scrubbing mud out of the carpets and picking up beer bottles. Then I woke up at 10am and cleaned up until I had to go to work at 3pm. I know... I should have left it there for them to clean up. But I couldn't. Oh also Eli (one of the twins) had his girlfriend in my dad's bed all night. Ah...brings back memories. Turns out that my uncle was there the whole time and even partied with them for a little while.

Hung out with Mike and Keith on Monday. Went to Texas Roadhouse and Fox and the Hound. And here is my drink list for the night...
* two rum and pineapple juice slushies
* two strawberry margaretards
* long island iced tea
* cranberry and vodka
* 2 red-headed slut shots
* multiple gulps of ronrico rum and yukon jack (my dad says its whiskey)
How in the fuck did I not throw up everywhere?

Saw Nate at the bar and he filled me in on a recent convo he had with Matt... (yeah he was also there)

Matt: So you have seen Cook around? (yeah what a dick!)
Nate: No she's pretty busy, blah blah blah.
Matt: Yeah well good, she's hella lame!

He seriously used "hella" in a serious conversation. Well then he called I think the next day... "I want my fucking DVD's back." So he come's over and I'm all..."So what's your fucking problem, that's why I wanted to be civil so you wouldn't think you had to talk shit about me to my friends." He's all, "Well I'm still in love with you and I can't get you out of my head and it pisses me off when I see you." Damn right it does. Motha fucka.

Ok backing up a little bit... I come home from going out with Mike and K and Cindy stops me at the door... "You will not believe what you missed last night." Apparently she got her sons drunk (whatever) and they had some girls over. Brian (the other twin) had this one girl over that he has been "talking to." Well it ends up that she realized that she liked Aden (oldest son)more. Cindy walked in on them humping under a blanket on the couch after they thought everyone had gone to sleep. Turns out that she was 17. Who knows how to spell "statuatory?" Wait I don't think I spelled it right. Oh well you know what I mean. Funny comments the next morning after Cindy told everybody (Aden still sleeping on couch minus girl):
Brian: Dude, Aden get up!
Brandon (kid's friend) :No, he doesn't want us to see the 2 year old that he's hiding underneath the covers.

Dad(walking into the room): He is still sleeping?
Brain: Yeah he's trying to sleep the Chlamydia off!

I LOVE IT!

Since then? not really anything. Went to work today. It's my 2nd day out of orientation, meaning that I'm totally on my own. Scariest thing: I thought one of my patients was having a heart attack. He's okay though.

Well im gonna expire.
I'm out.

If you step to me, I'll burn you like toast

Yes the past weekend was really fun. Liz and JD did wicked awesome on their belt test. Karaoke parties are always bad ass. I really want a copy of that DVD.

Well shit, I thought had a lot to write about and now I can't think of a damn thing. Oh I hung out with Keith yesterday, well actually hung out with me while I was shopping. Anyway, we're in the parking lot of Best Buy and this black guy pulls up next to us and is all "Hey can you guys do something for me.... I live in Mt Vernon and I came here to visit my friend and his unemployment check didn't come in and we need like $7 to get gas so we can make it home." Well neither K nor I had any cash on us...so I was all "Can you wait here for a couple minutes... and I 'll go to the ATM." He said, "No we will follow you, it's not like this is a robbery or anything." What the hell was that?!?!?!? I have no problem helping anybody out, but why did he have to add that in. I think that was a worse feeling than actually getting robbed. So I got him some money and he didn't even really thank me. He kinda made it feel like I owed him something. I still feel really suspicious about the whole thing. Maybe I got scammed...oh well.

This weekend my Dad and Cindy are going to the Brickyard and I have a sneaking suspicion that the boys are going to try to have a party in the house. SO I think I may have to beat some ass.

Well I'm gonna go dick around at USI.

Keeeeeeop