I Smoke My Hydro On The Dee-lo

Hey everybody. I have returned. Sorry it took me so damn long to update. I have had a bunch of shit going on. And I would like to explain in full detail but I fear that certain people may have this address, so you will just have to ask me in person. It has a lot to do with why I haven't updates. But anyways....

I have started as a nurse resident. Trying to convince my dad that I don't need to live with him "until I get married off." He seriously thinks that it would be beneficial for me to stay at least 3 more years. Bleh. I want to get out of here so bad I can taste it. With my first paycheck I am going to start buying stuff for my house. YAY! Let's see what else has been going on....

Went to Corinne's grad party last weekend. Speaking of, Am I invited to Chris' Grad Party? Some one call me about that! Oh and I saw Dustin(not Toni's boyf--I think Liz would be the only person who would know who I am talking about, so I guess the rest of this story is for you). Apparently Marc is back in Kokomo living with Al and working with guards there. Also Dustin is convinced that Marc is in love with him and trying to look like him. He also referred to him as a "fucking faggot" in several conversations. Also Jarrod and Dustin are planning on starting their own business and then on the side, Jarrod and Brad are going to start their own real estate business. hehehehheheheh. I just thought that was interesting.

I have been thinking a lot about some weird things lately while I'm in my car....

1) Why do I always have to be at the front of traffic? I seriously will weave through traffic until I'm in the front.
2)When I am at the front and stopped at a light, I get this scary feeling that I have suddenly become red-green colorblind and am not sure if the light is red or green so I wait until the cars in the lane next to me start to drive off.
3)I'm convinced that when I drive under a street light as it is burning out, that it's some bad omen.
4)This is the most fucked up...I think about how easy it would be to cause a huge pileup on the Lloyd just by barely swurving into the other lane. I don't do it, but the thought crosses my mind a lot.

Does anyone else have these thought?!?!

I think I might be going to Harpole's tonight. My best nursey friends are moving to Cinci a week from today. :( I have so fun hospital stories....

No names will be used to assure the confidentiality of the people involved...
1) A rather large lady came in through the ER after a car wreck. She was complaining of back pain. An x-ray was done. The results showed a calcified baby in her abdomen. She had become pregnant 3 years ago and due to some disease process the baby become part of her body. I guess she didn't think to question the fact that she hadn't had a period for 3 years.
2) A man came in through the ER convulsing. It looked like he was having alcohol withdrawal seizures. Well it turns out that this man had a dildo stuck up his ass and it was up too far to pull it out. His friends were the ones that called the ambulance because he was too embarrased. Get this...this dildo had been running for over 24 hours. All I have to say is... hook me up with some of those batteries!!

Well that's probably it.
BOW WOW WOW YIPPE YO YIPPE YAY!