DON'T START NO SHIT, WON'T BE NO SHIT

Another list of interesting happenings in my recent livings...

1. Lost $100 at the boat, but sadly enjoyed every second of it.

2. Heard the worst pick up line ever: Turn around and let me dance with that booty. I told him to get his big-nose-havin' self out of my fucking face.

3. Bought a couch, loveseat, and a recliner. The couch and loveseat are camel-colored and the recliner is olive green. They are all suedy. I get to pick them up on Friday.

4. Fake nails will be banned from the hospital effective May 1st. So mine are gone. Well I might get them put back on before my trip to Texas.

5. Wore knee high boots with a four inch heel and didn't fall or feel like a sasquatch.

6. Congrats to Nick and Kyle for getting in the newspaper. My dad saved it for me. And also apparently told all of his friends about it. He is very proud.

7. Went out to dinner with Corinne and didn't want to kill her.

8. Was walking around my room and my arm got caught on a hanger. I found it so amusing that I shot water that I had been drinking through my nose.

9. Got rear-ended at Harpole's just as soon as I parked. Then the guy drove off really fast before I could hop out and see his license plate, leaving a big green stripe on my car. Got to sit in the back of a cop car for 30 minutes. Actually had a good conversation with him. He has three black belts and teaches some kind of martial arts and is a professor at USI and likes Japanese art. Had some friends take pictures of me, so I could "accidentally" leave them sitting out on the dining room table for my father to "accidentally" see.

10. My father and mother were in the same room. My father was drunk. Totally awkward. Later after she left, my Dad confessed his everlasting, undying love for her. And told me that I have something to look forward to... aging beautifully like her. Bleh. He did bring me a stromboli from the sports bar though!

11. My mother has been trying for weeks to speak with my sister about sex and puberty and menstration, etc... Apparently she has started using deoderant. And my mother is freaking out.

12. Another thing about my mother...she likes to call me ass early on my days off. Like 7,8,9 am. As she did Sunday morning. Unlike a normal person that would say "oh you are sleeping, well call me later," she keeps talking, even after several reminders that I'm trying to sleep. And about stupid shit: what she needs to get at Wal-mart, what I am doing 2 thursdays from now, who see saw at the gas station, what detergent she just switched to. I almost had a nervous breakdown. I started screaming at her uncontrollably just short of exploding into tears. "I'm going to fucking freak out if you don't leave me alone." After that she let me sleep. But then I was so mad, I could feel the anger building up, like I seriously think I had smoke coming out of my ears. So I stomped around the house for a couple of hours and THEN went back to sleep.

13. Season finale of My Big Fat Obnoxious Fiance' is on tonight.

14. Just printed off 13 10-page articles for a dumb ass case study assignment.

15. Start clincials at Matthew 25 next week. I am actually very excited. Should be incredibly interesting and work my time, unlike most of the shit I have to do for this damn degree. One thing that I am totally not looking forward to drivign over the bridge to Henderson. I fucking hate bridges!

16.There was a guy that fell of a cliff at Garden of the Gods a couple weeks ago. I know because it was all over the news. Well he was just over here with Brian, fucking weird. He has like 100 staples in his face.

17. I ordered a bunch of shit off the internet last week and I got it in the mail today. My favorite: a light switch plate that has a picture of the statue of David on it and where his penis should be, there's a hole for the switch. Love it.

18. Gonna go do some laundry and rub one out.